


freemind experiences an emotion (its gay)

by gigaremo



Category: Half-Life
Genre: First Kiss, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Not Beta Read, Requited Love, how is that not a tag wh, i dont know how to tag shit man i just work here, repressed sexuality, tending to wounds with romantic tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-22
Updated: 2020-10-22
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:21:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27143059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gigaremo/pseuds/gigaremo
Summary: freemind is in hlvrai durinf black mesa somehow and catches feelings for tommy. yeahdm drabbles between me nd @mr.coolatta on insta (hes da >>). check him out his arts swagadocious
Relationships: Tommy Coolatta/Gordon Freemind, mindlatta
Comments: 2
Kudos: 54





	freemind experiences an emotion (its gay)

Tommy pushing Freemind out of the way of bullets soon after he Insists he can fight just fine after a headcrab nearly chewed his hand off. After Tommy kills the attackers with minimal bullets he pulls away, scolding Freemind for being so reckless, moving to haul him up.

Freemind is already in such a daze over being pressed so close to him and witnessing his trigger finger up close, he isn’t even prepared to start processing how easily Tommy can just manhandle him (in the HEV suit, even!) despite being so skinny, pulling him along to a med station to get properly healed after denying needing one, before he was fumbling with his gun in the face of assault rifles trained on his head.

Freemind tries not to think too hard about how warm Tommy’s hands feel even through the thick HEV suit glove, how his golden eyes shimmer with concern for him in spite of how brash he always is, how tenderly he helps remove the glove, inspecting it for any further damage, tongue poking out in concentration as he assesses its condition. He tries to ignore how warm it makes him feel, how Tommy’s care for him and his safety is so alien to him amidst all the time he's spent shoving others way, insisting he hates people and doesn't need friends (except robots, they’re cool as fuck). He tries to ignore the way his heart skins a beat when Tommy carefully bandages a gash on his palm that the station didn't have enough juice in to fully heal, having torn off a clean portion of his lab coat, gently wrapping it, asking if it’s too tight with sunny eyes on his own. He ignores how Tommy looks at him when he notices how fast Freemind’s started breathing, how his eyes jitter on the ground below, deliberate in ignoring his gaze.

He can’t ignore the way Tommy huffs out a small giggle, remarking how quiet and compliant he's being, catching onto his warm cheeks and and shaky hands, but ((un)luckily) misses the reason. He can't ignore the squeeze on his hand, light enough to not hurt the wound, but hard enough to ground him before putting the suit glove back on him. He can’t ignore how he feels like he's gonna melt under his soft touch, his gentle care, his honey gold eyes. He can’t ignore that he's falling for the man before him.

>> I see them. And I appreciate them jesus god you’re making my brain feel phenomenal - Freemind longing for the touch of this well mannered bright eyed scientist… do you think Tommy is thinking gay thoughts about Freemind or is he oblivious?

I feel like Tommy can catch on to shifts in behavior well, noticing out of character stuff from his friends. Knowing why, however, can be difficult for him, as how people communicate their emotions in nonverbal and nondirect manners isn't the same across all persons, and without a clear guideline as to what means what, he struggles with open outcomes. He makes rough guesswork, and can catch on a bit after seeing how a person shows their range after some time, but mostly he operates with a hunch, nervous to ignore these changes, but hesitant to make leaps in thought in case he's wrong, sticking to small things.

So, with Freemind, he notices how much more quiet the man gets with him, voice softer than its usual crass bark, face softer, cheeks warmer. He doesn't know quite why, but he can't help but find a blush rather endearing on the shorter man's face, pretty under his green eyes.

The others catch onto Freemind’s behavior much quicker than Tommy, the reactions mixed. Feetman doesn't say anything, but does laugh when he fumbles around Tommy in front of them. Benrey is merciless about it, poking him about it and calling him a chicken hat for not saying anything. Bubby’s loud about it, telling him to nut up or shut up, says he's slowing them down with him ‘being busy making goo goo eyes at Tommy all day’. And Coomer is blunt, stating the obvious, the occasional 'for five Playcoins(™), I can tell you if he feels the same!'. And meanwhile, Tommy just finds Freemind’s eyes getting caught on his hands when they touch his suit and the way his eyes glitter when he shoots a gun endearing as all hell. It’s cute, he'll admit, like a newborn puppy, and, okay, maybe he's toyed with the thought of kissing that warm, scarred face. Just a little, yknow?

>> Sorry I’m asking so many questions… Do you have a scenario in mind where Freemind confesses or they have a good moment where they like, seal the deal if that makes sense?

Mm! I’m not sure, I feel like it would be in a moment of impulsivity on both sides. They’re both rather heads first in their approach, and when they've both found themselves wandering around in the idea of the other, it was bound to happen in one way or another.

Maybe Freemind gets hurt, a moment of reckless behavior born from him trying to prove to himself that he doesn't need Tommy’s help this time, that he can't let him be so vulnerable under those twin sun eyes again. The irony in doing so leads him to getting hurt again, and badly - fell way farther than he estimated and could just barely shoot off the soldiers while prone on the floor. Tommy comes to his rescue, like always, scolding him like a mother hen, asking why he just ran off ahead like that when they knew it was a tricky area, and Freemind can't bullshit an answer, too lost in the haze of pain from his knee. Much to his dismay, his suit ran out of morphine some time ago already, so he's been left to brace the full extent of the damage, teeth grit and hissing out mindless curses as he struggles to cradle it.

It takes Tommy a moment to process it while focused on the events leading to this, but when he does his starts to fret, stuttering a marathon as he leans over and picks up Freemind like he weighs nothing, a bridal carry, scruffy face tucked under his chin as he gallops his way to the nearest med station, Freemind too lost in his injury to even focus on his position. But once Tommy’s laid him back on the ground, so careful of his leg, and has started the careful removal of the suit leg, accessing his bare knee, his brain blue screens, the conflict of a broken knee and the man of his affections stripping his leg to help him after his own reckless behavior to escape this exact sort of vulnerability, it just cancels out to a pause, eyes wide as Tommy looks him over, cleaning blood off and shifting around for a disinfectant, fretting about health and OSHA safety compliance (where was the fence on that walkway? That’s fine worthy, the-ghost-of-Black-Mesa!) while tending to him.

When he's wrapping it up, using up even more of his coat in the name of helping Freemind, he looks up, and finds a flame of courage in those honey eyes. Reckless, impulsive courage, burning down the padlocked closet door with the assistance of caring hands and concerned eyes, fire lit under the tender drip of gasoline held by the gentle hands of the most gorgeous man he’s ever seen.

He surges forward, not even thinking, his body working on its own, and grasps Tommy’s cheek, warm under the palm of his glove, and presses him forward, touching his chapped lips to Tommy’s. His indulgent, previously shameful daydreams were right - they're soft, tasting faintly of strawberry chapstick.

It was quick, only a moment, going by like a bullet - it was him shooting his shot with a gun he locked away years ago. When he pulls away, those eyes are on him, mouth in a small o, eyebrows shot up, eyes wide on him. But, his cheeks were dark, and his eyes, they glowed under the dim lighting like stars, stoking the scared embers with hope. After a beat, a laugh is felt more than heard, joyful breath dusting his tingling lips as tommy starts chuckling, crows feet and dimples happy as he bonks their foreheads together, a hand resting on his shoulder now

"Thanks for, uh, doing that. I didn’t, I wasn’t sure if I, uh, if I could, do that - wasn't sure if you, if you wanted to or not. Your beard is-is ticklish, did you know that? Like a uh, uh, a hedgehog. Prickly.”

Freemind just drops his head into Tommy’s chest, shoulders shaking in a laugh, building up from a small bubble in his throat to a loud affair, throwing his head back, tears pricking the corners of his eyes. It’s so ridiculous, unexpected after such a brazen act, nothing he would’ve seen coming. And it was so Tommy, who flooded his chest in a lightweight warm just by being there.

And, it was what he wanted to hear. That Tommy wanted this, too. That the tornado of emotions swirling his mind ever since he met him, it was wrong. Those thoughts that threatened to tear the roof off his house, battered his windows with the shouts of ‘he’ll never feel the same, you’re disgusting for even considering it, stop being such a [REDACTED] and be fucking normal’ - they were fucking wrong.

He just kissed Tommy Coolatta, and he’ll never look back.

**Author's Note:**

> MORE MINDLATTA CONTENT FREEMIND IS A STUPID REPRESSED BISEXUAL AND HE WILL BE KISSED BY THAT MAN AND HE WILL BE VERY FLUSTERED ABOUT IT SIRI SEND FUCKIN TWEET i hope i turned more ppl w this. You Will See Them And You Will Go 'oh they should kiss'


End file.
